2015,  Girls on Food,  Musings

Musings: Almost Asking

If you don’t ask, you don’t know.

Those damn old adages are so annoyingly true. You’d think I’d have learned my lesson after 32 years of life, but I’m still learning. I also think they are a little more annoying (re cute & lovingly, of course) because J loves to use these cheesy, old sayings…all the time!
I haven’t quite mastered the outright ‘ask,’ but I’ve definitely stepped up my ability to hint or suggest what I’m looking for. From the small things to the big things, it’s a skill I’ve been trying to master lately. I like to think I can do everything all on my own, but I’m not naive. I know that I can’t do it all and that there are others who can help me at times, I just have to ask. Or try to ask…
A very small example of an ‘almost ask’ is when my alum posted a pic of a super cute coffee mug on IG. I commented along the lines of, “this Alumnus would love that mug.” Obviously implying I wanted one, but I didn’t think they would actually contact me and send me one, which they DID!! The only thing they asked in return was for a tagged pic on social media. Easy. So now I have a cute little mug from the Orfalea College of Business. It’s really the small things that make the difference…
A bigger “almost ask” was when I stumbled upon Girls on Food. I peeped their IG and then looked at their website, where I left them an email complimenting their cause. Did I hope they responded and invite me to write for them? Of course, I did! And that’s exactly what happened, well kind of. It definitely opened the door for communication to the opportunity, which I ended up taking. I’m glad I contacted them with my ‘almost ask,’ it’s led to some fun events and honing in on my writing skills (re need grammar refresher stat)!
It doesn’t come easy for me. Does it for you? The small stuff isn’t so hard, but the bigger more significant asks are tough. Fear of rejection. Fear of criticism. Fear of denial. Fear of it ALL. The ‘ask’ isn’t limited to physical things, it encompasses everything – things in any relationship (romantic or friendship), your career, your family, anything that you deem important. Like J loves to say, ‘You miss all the shots you don’t take.’ Okay, okay. It’s coming in loud and clear!
Take the risk, ask the ‘ask!’


  • Kristen

    I can relate to this in so many ways. I am always afraid of asking for favors/help from people. It has been a real challenge for me since Axel was born because I do feel like I need help, I just don't know how to ask for it at times. I never want to appear weak. Your notion of taking a risk and setting aside those fears is one I need to implement more in my own life. You just never know unless you try/ask/take a risk. I think this is much easier to do when it comes to little things vs. big things. Still trying to figure that one out! 🙂

  • Musings of a Girly Tomboy

    I have a feeling I will take any and all help when I have a kid. I'll let anyone babysit! Haha, yeah right…but it's a good thought! I think we are all trying to navigate this, continually. It's the balance of being needy vs the perception of being strong. But, to be the best Momma to Axel, asking for help shows you are being strong for him! Xoxo, ganeeban

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