2019,  Family,  Friends,  Musings,  Sacramento

Musings: Home Sweet Casa

Mi casa es tu casa.

Home Sweet Home, Target

Well, kinda. There just isn’t much room for you to sit. Unless you’re okay with hanging out like kids. And by that, I mean sitting on my bed! HAHA

Earlier this year I started looking for a new place. My time with the Guidette was transformative, to say the least, but it was time to find somewhere new to live. I fell in love with the first place I saw. I know, I know — don’t settle for the first thing you see (or date for that matter HAHA).

I saw one more studio and I was still smitten with the original one I saw. A friend lives there, which is how I found the one I have. I signed the application and chose my studio, right then and there that first day — even though I knew I’d try to look more.

Fast forward two months, when my studio was supposed to be done. Not so much 🙁 Fast forward another two weeks, still not done. At this point, I moved into my parent’s house for the time being, until my studio was finished.

Alas, another two weeks and my sweet humble abode was finally finished. I was officially a Grid Kid again! I did enjoy being roommates with my parents, even if I felt foreign living at home. I couldn’t even turn their fancy new oven on. How embarrassing is that?!

Those transitional weeks of not knowing when my new place would be available were stressful. Work was, and is, crazy at the moment. Add trying to pack up all my stuff with a very unstable move-in date, finding last-minute solutions for my crap, and trying to ask friends to move with an unknown date and time. Needless to say, I’ve been feeling unsettled lately. I knew this, I accepted it, and I tried to fall into it so I wouldn’t stress out.

But I did. I’m human. Even though I kept telling myself it would all work out, my skin broke out because I’m human. I still need to work on how I internalize stress. Outwardly, most would never know, but inside its an anxious and worried mess. Although it is rare, it happens.

But it has all been worth it.

I am settled and poorer thanks to Target, Amazon, and The Container Store. But I’m happy. So extremely happy to be in my very own space. I don’t have to share it with anyone. I can walk around naked if I want — oddly, people love to point this fact out for some odd reason.

I’ve heard a lot of people say that everyone should live alone at least once. I’ve also heard I’d love it. And the verdict is in, I do. I get it. There is something wholesome about knowing you are living in your own space supporting yourself. No roommates, no partner. Just me.

It feels weird to say this at 36, but it’s just how it worked out for me. And you know what, I’m okay with it. I’m okay with being single, living alone, and finding my way as I grow through what I go through. It isn’t easy, perfect, or pretty BUT I get to do it, learn from it, and experience it as me.

While I’d love to host a studio-warming, my space is not optimal for that. So, friends have been coming and going as their schedule permits. And if one more person calls my new place “cute” I’m going to cute their face-off. Kidding, but I think they don’t know how else to address such a small space.

I appreciate the friends and family who helped during this move, AND all the other various moves. It’s always a telling sign of true friendships when you are in need. I’m lucky and grateful for my support system because I have used it more in the last two years than I ever have. It feels weak, but it’s a blessing to know I’m surrounded by the right people I’ve kept in my life. So, thank you for helping me with all the big and small things you continue to do!

And everyone who helped me move thought I couldn’t fit all of my stuff in my new place. I’m happy to report I did. Some things are being stored at the Parentals, but for the most part, I am a Tetris queen! My obsession with organization was at an all-time high and it is oddly satisfying. Need help organizing your life, I’m your gal!

I’m excited to start a new chapter in my novel. Not sure whom or what it will bring, but I know it will include my little haven just for myself. A place that is mine. Just mine. Something I’ve never been able to say. And that feels good…even if other things aren’t working out the same.

Tiny spaces are all the rage!

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