• 2018,  Musings

    Musings: More Than Just the BOOs

    But BOOs is also pretty awesome too! The distraction of international travel didn’t really leave much mental space for Halloween thoughts. I had less than two days + jetlag to get my act together and get into the ghouly spirit. I anticipated not actually caring since the last four Halloweens were dedicated to someone else(s), but I actually felt like I should and kinda wanted to too. Work is ALL about Halloween. It seems to have stemmed from a previous CEO, but don’t quote me on that. People take it seriously around here. Emails more than a month prior go out about the decor and theme. And you thought I was…

  • 2018,  Musings,  Relationships,  Wellness

    Musings: Moving On

    …and letting go. This seems to be the last and hardest part of the relationship process. Obviously with a breakup, but also with any relationship ending too. Or any situation that has posed strife or hardships. While they are independent, moving on and letting go, most times one precludes the other. Not always, but sometimes. This has, by far, been the hardest thing for me to do. I can’t control it and when I do, I only makes it harder on myself. My intuition is too good, sometimes I try to ignore it. The evening I heard Juan speaking Spanish to someone on the phone late at night, I knew. My…

  • 2018,  Musings

    Musings: I Want to Be an Emotional Role Model

    I’m sure you have never put ’emotional’ before ‘role model’ before. If you have, then I’d say count yourself as one of the aware ones. When it comes to talking about emotions and vulnerability, I still feel like I have to preface this topic for those who stop by here to read my musings. I need you to know, if you think (re: judge) that talking about this stuff is a little weird, cooky, odd, or over the top [insert any adjective you’d like here] I get it, but I also know that I didn’t grow or learn by NOT talking about this stuff. I’ve learned SO MUCH by taking the time to…

  • 2018,  Family,  Musings

    Musings: Disowned at 35?

    Can your Mother disown you at 35? Asking for a friend. HAHA! Kidding, mostly! But seriously, she was a champ about it all, BUT I do know how much she detests what I did. Well, I should say what WE did. Lil and I. 35 years later, about 25 years of being told I wasn’t allowed too, Lil and I finally got our first tattoos. The permanency of a tattoo felt daunting. Is there something that you want on your body for your ENTIRE life? No going back when its there. There is one thing I always wanted, a soccer ball. However, my Mom is adamantly opposed to her daughter having…

  • 2018,  Musings,  Triathlon

    Musings: Ganeeban DOES NOT Tri in 2018

    I don’t want to write this post. I feel like a failure. I feel weak. I’ve let myself down. I’ve let you down. But I do want to honor myself. I want to honor my true self and be intentional about my actions. I know I put it out there (into the Social Media world) to keep myself accountable. I even paid for professional training. But life got messy and Triathlon training was no longer important. My six weeks of grueling Tuesday Tri training’s were intense, hard, and great growth for me to learn more about the sport. They built me up and created a newfound excitement, only to be deflated…

  • 2018,  Health,  Musings,  Wellness

    Musings: My (Natural) Deodorant is Giving ME Anxiety

    I don’t follow most of the fads… I think sometimes people think I don’t follow them on principle of not trying to be a cool kid. But really, if I’m not into it, I’m just not into it. And so no need in faking like for vampires (they truly scare me), books that hype up S&M or some wizard child. I’m not here to judge your liking of it all, it’s just not my thing. But I do follow some of the fads. I guess I wouldn’t call them fads, per se. After repeatedly hearing that too much soy is not good for women, guess who switched to rice milk?…

  • 2018,  Musings,  Wellness

    Musings: Lash Out

    Lash out… But not in the psycho, angry at the world kinda way. Like the beautiful, lashing of your eyes! I’d been saying for a while I wanted them. I have done extensive, local research for cost and skills. This is an expensive journey to start, from the initial set to the frequency of fills. That all being said, I decided to not to go for it. Eventually, I started the process over again, trying to find a reasonable solution. I’d done three rounds of this, without following through. Mostly, because the cost seems exorbitant and I already have enough girly maintenance that’s built into my budget. I honestly couldn’t justify…

  • 2018,  Health,  Musings,  Wellness

    Musings: A Recovering Absolutist

    Black and white, all or nothing, should have or should have not… Do you ‘absolute‘ things in life? I have. I always have. It’s taken some (re: a lot) of self-reflection to understand that I am an absolutist. After doing a quick Google search about this type of thinking, it makes so much more sense why I react to certain things and situations like I do. I want to think I’m a ‘go with the flow’ type of person, but really, I’m not. I want to be and am going to work towards adopting that mentality, but it will be hard. Really effing hard. I also realized my Momma Bear…

  • 2018,  Family,  Friends,  Musings,  Relationships,  Wellness,  Wine

    Musings: A SURPRISE Breakup Party

    No Juan was harmed during this celebration! I feel like this type of thing only happens to Real Housewives of [insert hella different cities] or on SATC! N E V E R did I imagine my girl tribe would surprise me with a breakup party! I woke up the next day with the largest smile I’ve had in a long time and even caught myself literally laughing out loud to myself, about the antics of a wonderful evening celebrating my breakup. The group chat for the entire next day was literally giving me life and had me laughing out loud in my cubicle and at the gym! Seriously, I am…

  • 2018,  Musings,  Religion

    Musings: I’m Dating Religion

    I have been, on and off, for a long time. But now, with more time on my hands, I can actually continue courting the religion that best fits my beliefs. I’ve actually been wanting to find the right fit for a while. It is intimidating. Maybe that’s an excuse, but I do feel overwhelmed when it comes to religion. The topic is polarizing and somewhat taboo, so it seems intimidating to find the right balance in persons to talk to about it all. Also, I haven’t truly made it a priority, even though I’ve had this nagging feeling it was something I want in my life. However, I still don’t…