• 2019,  Musings,  New Year

    Musings: 2010s, A Colorful Decade

    Not your average end of the year post. I honestly didn’t even think that as 2020 approaches, not only are we ending 2019, but we are ending a decade. Funny how life works out that way. As I sat here thinking about the last ten years, I was trying to think of the highlights, which proved a little difficult… Off the cuff, I came up with the following: 2010 – Traveled solo for the first time (Kauai) 2011 – Completely hiked Half Dome for the first time 2012 – The SF Giants won the World Series 2012 – Started my career at Blue Diamond Growers 2013 – I started blogging…

  • 2019,  Mental Health,  Musings

    Musings: October Reset

    Fall has me in my feels. Well, I think it’s a bunch of life things happening, but I have an overwhelming sense that I need a reset of sorts. I need to start fresh if you will. Fall recently arrived, but the Sacramento weather has taken an unexpected chilly turn. I’m used to October still hovering in the 80s for a couple of weeks, but we are now in the brisk 60s. This weather change has coincided with some life changes. Not even big or anything I want to detail out here, but just change. Change happens all the time, but sometimes its more impactful than we realize. It felt…

  • 2019,  Mental Health,  Musings

    Musings: I Realized I’m a People Pleaser

    And I’m not okay with it… …at all! I want to write about this because it took hours of therapy and self-reflection to truly understand this. Then it took a while to accept this, but more importantly, I’m learning from it. And for that, I’m grateful I recognized it and can move forward in a different direction. There is definitely a spectrum of people-pleasing, and I’m somewhere in the middle. I don’t have an eager to please that stems from self-worth issues. In turn, I do act according to how rejected and/or accepted I anticipate an outcome will happen. The most important part of my process of understanding my people-pleasing…

  • 2019,  Mental Health,  Musings

    Musings: Expectations

    Everyone has them, but not everyone lives up to them. Scrolling through IG stories, I came across a story that put one of life’s biggest lessons so simple: Stop expecting YOU from people. When I read that, I was like, “THIS is what I’ve been trying to articulate for forever!” This is one of my biggest lessons I’ve learned in my 30’s. It’s taken that long for me to realize this and I am trying not to judge myself for this, but I’m just grateful I know it now. It doesn’t make it any easier when I feel let down. But it is teaching me to release expectations. Or at…

  • 2019,  Career,  Musings,  Wellness

    Musings: ENFP

    I’m going to start using Myers-Briggs to vet potential dates! I haven’t heard four letters thrown around so freely until I started at my current employer. I’ve taken the test a handful of times, on my own accord. But I’ve never had my employer be such a huge advocate for Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI). They encourage us to find ours, then they go deeper and teach you to communicate and learn from other types. I enjoy professional development, probably more than most. I was really excited to sign up for this course and to solidify which four letters would be assigned to me. Little did I know, they aren’t assigned…

  • 2019,  Health,  Mental Health,  Therapy

    Musings: Let’s Talk About Therapy

    I’m just a girl who needed a therapist and decided to talk openly about it. I’m honored that people have reached out to me in regards to my experience with therapy and finding a therapist. I am not an expert and am still in the fresh stages of therapy, less than one year. But I would love to share my experience if it help others. Since I chose to be very open about my mental health post-breakup, a handful of friends and acquaintances have reached out about the details of my experience with therapy. While I believe sharing my truth is also being authentic with those around me, it has…

  • 2019,  Dallas,  Musings,  New York,  Travel

    Musings: Life is Like My AWAY Luggage

    Saying ‘you have baggage’ is way overplayed. But in all seriousness, as I was painfully sitting through my three-hour layover in Dallas waiting to get home after eight days in New York, I got to thinking. Yes, randomly thinking about life, musing to myself. Unlike my AWAY luggage, the bumps and bruises of my life are hidden behind my brown skin. If you look at my AWAY luggage, it is no longer the pristine pale pink it once was when I first received it. It has colorful scrapes, luckily no dents yet. But what those scrapes can’t tell you is it has been to Italy, Orange County, and New York.…

  • 2019,  Health,  Musings,  Travel

    Musings: Verbal Download

    I haven’t done a purging of thoughts in a while, so here I am. Buckle up and get ready for the randomness train… Food Musings – Do men think about their bodies and food as much as women? This was a question I’ve posed to a few friends. Of course, the immediate answer is no. We’ve come to the conclusion that men don’t sit idle thinking about their weight, their body, and their food intake. I’m sure it passes through their consciousness, but they don’t dwell as women do. It’s almost as if I am re-programming myself to have positive thoughts about food. Why do we call food ‘bad?’ Why…

  • 2019,  Musings,  Running

    Musings: I’m in a Relationship

    As the sun was setting, gazing at the most beautiful views of a cotton candy colored sky, I realized something. Something so profound, everything made so much sense at that moment. The clarity was almost too much for me to wrap my brain around. But with each stride, I fell into a clearness that once seemed so unreachable and far away. Finally, my first run of the year was simply, yet lucidly unraveling the jumbled thoughts and ideas I’ve had about running for a long time. Lately, running and I have had an extremely volatile relationship. To be fair, it has been volatile since I ran the Napa marathon in…

  • 2019,  Musings,  Relationships

    Musings: The BIG Question

    The question that everyone keeps asking me. I get it, it’s the perfunctory question that society tells us to ask someone who is recently-ish single. Akin to asking newlyweds when they are going to have children. Pls do not misconstrue this as saying this is right or what you should do, but its a societal norm — a norm we should be cognizant of and really ask ourselves if its a necessity. I know people aren’t asking for malicious reasons, they are just checking in with me. But it is awkward to answer, just as I’m sure it is a little awkward for people to ask someone else. What’s next?…